5 things you should never mention in your best man’s speech

The best man’s speech is one of the most eagerly anticipated parts of a wedding day. The speech itself has to deliver on every front, providing an entertaining moment for all as well as a fitting roast that could leave the groom a little red-faced.

Striking the right balance between a great speech and a completely embarrassing tell-all is the key. There are a few subjects that you should omit from your best man’s speech, here are our top five.


Mentioning exes of the groom or bride is a big no-go area. Especially if said ex-partners are still friends and are even attending the wedding.

No matter how funny your memories are of the groom’s ex-partners, mentioning exes will only cause upset, especially for the bride.

Their sex life

Crudity of any kind should be omitted from your best man’s speech, and that includes any jokes about the couple’s sex life.

Adding jokes to a best man’s speech is a great way to go, in fact people expect them! Make sure you know your audience and avoid the cringe-worthy humour that’s likely to go down like a lead balloon. Jokes should be easily understood, avoid using in-jokes or slang that only a select few will comprehend.

The divorce rate

The wedding day is the start of the rest of the couple’s married life, so don’t bring the mood down with any mention of divorce rates, or the bride or groom’s past marriages and divorces.

Instead of throwing negative statistics out there to grab attention, take the audience on the emotional ride of their lives. Add variety to your speech by varying the pace, tone and subject matter to make the speech more interesting as a whole.

Stag party antics

It’s likely that the guests invited to the wedding are a mix of family, friends and work colleagues, which means the nitty-gritty details of your groom’s stag party may not be welcomed by most of your audience.

While the friends who attended the stag will be in stitches, granny and grandpa won’t be. Don’t leave fellow guests excluded or uncomfortable with stories of bad behaviour, instead save the stag do stories for your catch-up with the groom at the bar.

Keep your speech good-natured and positive. Remember that some embarrassment is expected in a best man’s speech but not complete character assassination!

Your life story

It’s important to remember that your best man’s speech isn’t about you. You should be busy toasting the happy couple, not sharing your life story as A Practical Wedding details:

“Sure, context is good (‘I met Evan when we were in karate together…’) but keep it brief. And for goodness sakes, do not try to tell the story of your life, or your friend’s life, or your life together, while people start wondering if the bar is open for refills. Keep in mind, this speech isn’t about you, and it isn’t even just about your friend—really, it’s about the couple getting married.”

Introducing yourself and informing the crowd of your relationship to the bride and groom is a great opener.

But that’s where your story ends and the story of the bride and groom begins. Keep your wedding speech short, snappy, and entertaining with our guide to wedding speech length.

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